Thursday, July 09, 2009

Just bury Michael Jackson already

True love is all about sharing all kinds of neat experiences, and the other day while we were watching THE ONLY THING ON THAT WASN'T ABOUT MICHAEL JACKSON DYING ...JESUS CHRIST.. CAN I GET A CHANNEL? Sean was amazed when I announced I'd never seen My Own Private Idaho during our conversation about "real hollywood tragedies: river phoenix" and promptly downloaded it for us to lay in bed to watch the following night.



Annnnnd. That was interesting.

I'm not even going to get into the movie because what really got to me was the fact he was so narcoleptic that it was a true tragedy just letting him be alive. His character was given all the crap in life without the self-awareness that could have made it make any sense. I would have been relieved if they killed him off in the end .. like Old Yeller.

Burn Sanderson: You can't hardly tell at first, not till they get to the point of slobbering and staggering around. When you see a critter in that fix, you know for sure. But you want to watch for others that ain't that far along. Now, you take a bobcat or a fox. You know they'll run if you give 'em the chance. But when one don't run, or maybe makes fight at you, why, you shoot him and shoot him quick. After he's bitten you, it's too late.


I saw a whole documentary last month or so on the rehabilitation of seals in California, and one of the saddest cases for me was this really young happy seal pup had these insanely large tumors all over in its mouth just hanging out there like tentacles and being painful. They x-rayed it and saw there was no way of removing them without also removing its jaw. Doing that means it would never be able to survive in the wild which defeats the purpose, as they are not pets. It was just a genetic freak occurrence and the best thing they could do for it is euthanize the animal.

Side note: Andre was not a good lesson to kids about what pets are.



My question is why are we not allowed to feel that way about people? I just said I wished a character in a movie died and half of everyone reading this probably said "wow that's pretty harsh, why would you even say that!" as if it were a real living person. I know nothing can redeem the human spirit like numerous opportunities to fuck everything up in their lives.. but laying like a vegetable with no brain activity, or sitting in a hospital just waiting it out in pain to kick the bucket 'when God thinks its appropriate for you' just doesn't make much sense to me. I've been in situations personally where I have tried to make it make sense, said this person will be FINE because I'd like them to be fine and they're breathing and stuff, but it never happened. It never made sense. I am just saying, why can't someone feel that way and not be a bad person? Why can't we talk about that. I know the animal world is much different, people have decided they are allowed to make those decisions, but those seals were euthanize with compassion from people who love and devote their lives to save so very few of them. When it comes to people, I feel like its mostly about the fact nobody wants to take ownership of their own opinion on that topic.

Nobody wants to be the one to say, ya, killing people is a good idea. Nobody wants to be the one to say, I am totally behind you killing that person. I'd just like to know why it's not allowed when they see a person suffering, to at least not go through all kinds of crazy crap to keep them alive.

One of the only memories of my "real" dad was how he was cleaning out his shed and a mouse got injured so he went and killed him with a shovel. My mother is the complete opposite and I was always told we could save any animal by turning the house into some little animal hospital because there is no bigger tragedy in LIFE than something dying. The lesson: nothing should ever die. Got that? In retrospect my dad probably should have explained why he was killing the mouse beforehand (since I was under the impression we could fashion a little mouse cast or give it physiotherapy so it could walk on 3 legs) but it is a child who thinks everyone can be made better, everyone can change, everything in life is OK and we don't ever need to experience tragedy because if we don't want it to happen then it won't. It should be that way of course, we don't want a bunch of depressed kids, but let me just tell you the alternative is my mother running around like Dr Quinn Medicine Woman and let a bat die in a coffee can in the fridge because she thought it would like the cold.

Just opening up the conversation here.

As a note, one of the experiences I get to share in return for My Own Private Idaho: showing Sean eating berries off the tree in the backyard won't immediately kill you. You should have seen his face haha. MMM poison berries :)

Monday, July 06, 2009

Confession

I hope you're ready for this, that you're prepared.  My confession is so creepy I can't even explain!


I have the weirdest, deep-seeded fascination and chilling fear of Miniatures.  


I stumbled upon a website where this guy chronicled his creation of a scene and officers quarters from he novel Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World by Patrick O'Brian.  He made ALL the furniture himself, tracked down tiny coloured glass bottles and tiny metal medical equipment.. even tiny jelly for the tiny toast and handmade tiny genuine leather bound books for his itty bitty library.  CSI episode aside, that is both a fascinating and terrifying concept.  I should also mention he wired the candles to really light up.









 


 


I think innately the girl in me says WOW A DOLLHOUSE! I know I touched upon this before with things people think kids like to play with and what they actually play with, BUT I have always loved dollhouses quite a lot.  Now I think of it my grandma (who is insane in buying children anything and everything they want or are slightly interested in.  S'Mores, the robotic pony would have been mine.) did buy a few miniature furniture pieces for my dollhouse.  They were too detailed I think to be regular furniture, and one of the floorlamps did have a tiny lightbulb and plug.. where that was supposed to plug into I have no idea but that's not the point.  

The point is it's all fun and games until you realize an adult spent hours perfecting the recipe for miniature jam, and laying out the microscopic fork and knife with tweezers.  It's all very batman villianish.  I shudder just thinking of it because right away I'm forced to assume they think little characters come out while they sleep and live in the house.   This doesn't help either.



I am also fairly positive I saw a movie or read a book at some point where a real person was living in a miniature dollhouse world and didn't know how they got there and couldn't get out.  There was tiny fake fish on a plate in it too.  If I could only remember anything relevant about it... NO it's not Alice in Wonderland.

Wow I feel so much better I got this off my chest.  Miniaturely lighter, even.

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Fourth of July

Enjoyed a really great meal tonight for my grandma's 66th birthday today (July 4th and not an American, too bad she could have had fireworks). She enjoyed herself, the meal and actually liked the fish so much she mentioned it a few times, and that never happens. Then she actually liked the Lemon Cake I picked out .. and wasn't pushy at all before she left. Naturally, I got suspicious.

Speaking of, totally unrelated to this..

I hope you've all enjoyed my new weekly, colossally unfunny, webcomic. I just know you can't wait for the next one. Here's a closer look at some of the characters I drew. Guess which one is "rude".

So hard to believe I have no drawing talent whatsoever, right? I'll give myself a little credit here by admitting this is all trackpad, and I actually considered naming the comic along the lines of: F*MyTrackpad.
"Try the smoked salmon sushi with cream cheese center, made the traditional way"
- Sushi Sean re: the Mandarin

Friday, July 03, 2009

And now we know what happens

...when I have a little vacation time, aside from enjoying Asiago cheese and a little travelling.

Introducing my webcomic that I draw myself (omgz) called Rude Toothpaste, based entirely in fact of loosely exact situations that has happened in real life with myself and a person I won't name. We'll just say she's Italian, may or may not be my grandmother and her name rhymes with Hella. But those are all the crypic hints you're going to get!!



Comic#1: puke chicken salad

Thursday, July 02, 2009

Canada Day @ Niagra Falls





And here's a bear... who is burnt or dead.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The World Without Us

The World Without Us by Alan Weisman is a penetrating, page-turning, exploration of how our planet would respond without the relentless pressure of the human presence.

Check out what would happen to the earth 1 day to 5+ billion years if people disappeared.   Do you know?  Pretty interesting.
Dear Weather,

This is my last week of free time and we're planning on doing some traveling so please, either just rain or just be sunny for an entire day at a time.  I usually like samplers, like with cheese, but in this case I'd just like enough notice to know what shoes to wear.  And while we're talking here, could I ask one favour tomorrow?  If you could rain but just on my neighbours house and nowhere else so they can't launch fireworks on my deck that would be really great.  Picking up stuff that says "explosive" on it kinda creeps me out.

Your friend,
Ann-Marie





I forgot to mention I had a great time this weekend @ girls night with some friends, and Sharmy who I haven't seen since she moved to Alberta 4 years ago or so.  She got married and had a little guy in that time so it was pretty great to get to hang out and watch everyone get super drunk on the Devil (aka Tequila) and beers.  I was the a-hole who just watched, and I have no problem admitting it was fun!  I know Sharmy is a lightweight now she hasn't drank in 9 months but her sister Jaime though, she actually fell out of the car!  By the way, did you know Coke is FREE at the bar?  FREE.

Hope everyone has some great Canada Day plans :)  Nothing like celebrating your country by blowing up a large chunk of it. 

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Little to say

In the interest of not being repetitive, I will stop referencing anyone who dies after this point.  I just had to include this because of it's pure tech-cultureness. 



Celebrity pitch-man Billy Mayes Mays died and it was announced first by his son via Twitter this morning.  My only request to my children is now to simply never tweet my death.  That and pick up after themselves because GODDAMMIT I AM NOT A CLEANING LADY.

I say that with humbleness and love because it's a known fact I'd be booted out of cleaning school for writing "Fuck This" on every toilet my second day and therefore could never be a cleaning lady.  Bless their tidy little hearts.